As of April 19, 2010

Terry is vastly improved. She has terminal cancer which doctors believe started on her right lung and spread to her cerebellum and a small spot on her femur. This is a common pattern for this cancer. Less common in Adenocarcinoma is the spread of cancer to the spinal fluid. Terry has cancer cells in her spinal fluid. It was the presence of these cells which caused the hydrocephalus. I knew something was terribly wrong. Each night I wondered if she would still be breathing in the morning.Here is a website that gives a lot of information. In the list of symptoms, the only one Terry did not have was seizures. All this was a mystery - the website was found after the fact.


All that is past. We have endured - I say we because we have been a unit: I say "we" because these weeks I have felt as if i was merely an extension of Terry - the functioning part. We've been together almost constantly, except for dog-walking and sleeping. Oh and we shower separately, too. :)

Terry has no pain - the headaches were completely cured by the shunt to remove the hydrocephalus. She has no lung symptoms: no shortness of breath or coughing. She is spending time with her kids and talking to them openly and realistically about their future and about her dying. But she looks good and sounds good and she has really mellowed and is looking relaxed for the first time since i got here.

How much longer does she have?
We have no concrete answers about her prognosis. Today she is up and about and cooking herself some lunch and even tidying the kitchen a bit. The last time we saw the oncologist, Dr. Sally Smith, she made very clear non-committal statements "Most lung cancer patients have months, not years." Yet she also said that Terry's youth and prior health may allow her to fight the cancer more readily. And she said to try not to think in terms of "how long?" - but as we know, that question "how long?" is the one biggest thing in our minds, for all of us and each for our own reasons. Cancer is frustratingly unpredictable.

It is quite possible that she will rally and have a good summer. I don't know how often this kind of cancer goes into remission - whether she might actually have a year or more as was initially thought. I certainly hope so - partly for my own selfish reasons of wanting to spend the summer in my home with my husband and my last year with my daughter before she leaves for college.

It is also possible that the cancer cells in her spinal fluid will shut her down, cause loss of brain function, memory, balance, continence, coherence. I've been doing as much reading as I can and her specific diagnosis is uncommon, even for her type of cancer. I think this is also one reason the doctors are unwilling to give us any kind of time-table: they don't know.